Saturday, February 18, 2017



I don't know if you have noticed on the web that all these memes, which I finally found out what that is.
in case you were wondering, a meme is a picture with words for all those who don't know.
To ADULT, is extremely boring. It's the errands, it's cleaning it's the boredom of the days when there is nothing to do that you view as fun.  It's not remembering what's fun and having it very rarely.
The word is no longer a noun or adjective and, yes, despite my lack of punctuation and sentence structure in this blog I do know how to conjugate and say words correctly.




1.  A grown-up job----- means long hours, mundane tasks and the pay sucks. It means that your life will regress back to middle school social hierarchy

2.  It means you will never be good enough for your family and they will be looking for your next promotion. Well that may be a while have a seat and leave me be. In my case it means, your brothers will ignore you unless commanded not to and also make stuff up about what you do. When they have absolutely no clue.  

3.    As an adult there comes the problem that not everyone will like you. You are no longer a teen or 20-something they can shake their head at and say " Oh!  You! 20-somethings are crazy! Yep you will just be annoying. People will not be that forgiving either so accepting this is crucial and one of the hardest things to do.....

        Every once in a while you get a boss who just "gets" you. I had one boss who I butted heads with,  and my buffer boss, my porch,  was the best most patient boss ever. (Cough) French Porch (cough)          FRENCH PORCH--------------------------------------

      Possibly the most patient person you've ever met as well ever......  See the problem with people everyone likes (or should) if you don't know anyone like this just trust me. Make them your friend. Spend as much time with them as you can. Because the secret to their amazing super power will get out and when it does someone will take them away.
         They get promoted cause they are hugely in demand and because they are awesome and it's no longer a secret. Dammit!  So you grab their ankles and make them drag you to their new office!  Or you try...

but ultimately, they leave and it feels like you have no one on your side anymore.

       I was thinking about personalities the other day. My biggest and, at the moment, most hindering personality trait is butting in conversations. I think it stems from my days of being bullied at school and just wanting to be included. Trust me when I say, DONT DEVELOP THIS HORRIBLE HABIT. All it gets you is coworkers who include you in nothing, talk behind your back and make you feel awful all the time cause of this annoying habit. Then if you don't fix it IMMEDIATELY they won't try to like you until you do. It's a habit so it's not easy to break so you will have relapses and it will continue to annoy them and the circle starts over.

3.) Everyone has an annoying habit but if you enjoy a person they're annoying habits aren't as annoying or even very noticeable. Even so some people like above patient Dahli Llama supervisor can tell you to butt out and make you laugh all at the same time. When you are young this habit isn't as big a deal but when you are a grown up it IS A VERY BIG DEAL.

4. ) Communication skills deteriorate the more ADULT we become and the rare few who can master them. Be their best friend. SERIOUSLY BE WITH THEM AS MUCH AS YOU CAN.....THEY ARE RARE LIKE DIAMONDS OR FRENCH PORCHES.

5.) But of all the annoying habits my particular one is the most hated of all. I also like to help people. Usually when young, you learn helping people is good. When you are an adult "helping" becomes telling them they don't know how to do their job. So then they resent you for it and you really were trying to do a good deed. DO NOT DO THIS AS AN ADULT.  YOU WILL BE YELLED AT. ONLY HELP WHEN ASKED. THE ART OF LETTING PEOPLE FALL ON THEIR FACE WITHOUT A PILLOW FROM YOU IS HARD BUT IS PROBABLY ONE OF THE EASIEST THINGS TO DO.  I REPEAT DO NOT DO THIS......


Meet your dream man at college! THAT'S WHERE THEY STAY SUPPOSEDLY......Not at my college when I was attending but still. I don't know if that man exists, cause I am weird and not that great with guys...... 

When you become an "adult" and you have to adult everyday, finding a significant other is 50 times harder.....unless you look like Barbie (the doll) or my niece.  Oh and on a random tangent the sweetest teen turns into a butthead when they hit 18 PREPARE YOURSELF! I have some family that seriously need to be punched in the throat.  They are sucking more and more everyday.  I'm family not a hindrance.....we shall see payback is hard and it sucks.  Karma baby!!
the only problem is that Karma takes it's time.......and it's never served when you want it to be.


      So many people tell me just leave your work at work. I'm sorry but I do not posses the capability to go home and just forget the feelings I experienced all day. PLEASE PLEASE....IF YOU KNOW HOW.... FOR GOD SAKE TELL ME. 

I would love that but I honestly have no social life and friends that I rarely see or that are either just as mentally unstable or too busy, so I basically have no one to talk to. So I go to work and I'm interested in their lives and I offer up my comments.  Well when you are and adult. No one cares about your opinion.  No one wants your comments.  Just shut up and don't comment unless they specifically ask or unless they have known you forever. ....TRUST ME ON THIS I'VE LEARNED THE HARD WAY!

Adulting is hard and it's the longest stage of your life. I hope you come into it more prepared than I was. I had Book smarts,,,,,,,,CHECK,,,,,,street smarts......none....common sense....I mean depends on the situation. Something I've learned about common sense is that everyone has a different version of it. What I think is perfectly logical, someone else is all what the heck?

ADULTING means emotions and as this magic "adult" you are supposed to have complete control over every emotion, not cry for any reason no matter the emotion.

If you are winning an argument with someone, one you have worked up the nerve forever and have bullet points in your head and have for a bunch of years,  and then you start tearing up, every valid point you have doesn't matter at all anymore. Just the water leaking from your eyes you can't make stop.  Your entire thought out argument that you were winning comes crumbling down and all the kings horses and all the kings men cannot put it together again.


        It's a universal truth, when you put human beings, homo sapiens, people, folks, whatever you want to call them in a place together there WILL be drama. THERE WILL. Some people are built with this mind filter that like water through a sieve filters the impurities. Well mind filters can malfunction or just not exist all together. I have to start hunting mine down or get like an implanted one,  cause damn it's making life hell.

 STUPID ADULTING! Yeah I was born without the filter and what sucks is I think as you grow you can grow one....but if you have like happy childhood and parents who make you feel good about yourself, that filter can grow. Yeah let's just say mine didn't.  Drama is inevitable anyone who agrees with Mary J. Blige and wants "No More Drama" sit in your house alone.  That's the only place you aren't going to find it.

What's cool about those extra special Dahlia Llama French porch people is you meet awesome people through them and if they vouch for them you can trust them with your mafia business.....I mean....*shifty eyes*  secrets......

When you work with people you will have about 20 fellow employees and among said coworkers there filters about 1 or 2 people you can only sorta trust. Then among those 2 there will emerge 1 person who you can actually count on them having your back. Then change the situation a bit and if they still have your back they're legit.  These people are rare and hold on to them for dear life.

FORREST GUMP HAD MAMA. I HAVE DEAR OLE DAD.....My dad my whole life told me, "no one you work with is your friend, and just like Forrest's mama he's right......god I hate when he's right!

ENJOY COLLEGE!!!!!!!!!  MAKE THE MOST OF IT!!!!!!!!!! My brother told me this too....damn I especially hate when he's right......butthead.

That's your last time to socialize with people just like you that have things in common with you, that have no ulterior motive, this is where you make true friends. They are in the same stage of life as you and don't have kids and other responsibilities which makes you equal.  After graduation THIS CHANGES and it CHANGES QUICKLY.



 I have 2 significant people in my life,  Nori, and Barbie, (yes her actual name) So Seaweed ( what Nori means in Japanese) and a doll....... weird man.  Barbie is the only person who I've become close to through the internet.  It was weird when we met it was like instant BFF. 

                                                     it seriously was just like this......

 Why her? Who the heck knows but you didn't have that AWKWARD dance when you meet people. Ever since she's been, as they say on "Grey's Anatomy," my person.  Nori has been "my person" for years.  But all of my friends are married and parents and sometimes you have to sacrifice your "person" so they can be happy.  It sucks.  But every now and then you get to visit and you remember why you love them......Nori and Barbie if you are reading have no clue how important you are...... you two are the only two in the world that get how my brain works.   Nori calls me so accurately I wonder if she has surveillance cameras on's spooky....when you know someone for 20 years I suppose it's easy to call their bluff. 

                Recently, I went to the super nerdy but I don't care and never will.  Supernatural's in my town and you get to meet the stars of the show who unless you watch said show you have no idea who they are....... Here is me....with from left Misha Collins (Castiel), Jared Padalecki, aka moose or tall one, (Sam Winchester), Jensen Ackles, aka squirrel or not short we swear, (Dean Winchester), and last but not least Mark Sheppard, aka guest stars in every show,  who couldn't have been nicer (Crowley) I went by myself and not once was I lonely not for a second!

      If you asked me how many times I've put ANY makeup on in the past year. I can count 3 days.  The days of that convention.  It's super expensive, but we all get our one indulgence....mine is SUPERNATURAL AND IT'S STARS AND the conventions as well and VOSS water idk why....I just like it okay.  OH AND WATERMELON! I could eat my weight in Watermelon.

       I asked someone to call me before I went to help me with makeup.  One of those aesthetically gifted humans besides Nori, but the person couldn't do it and I had to do it all on my own. I guess when you have a best friend who puts makeup on you everyday on and off for 20 years. You apparently pick up the basics cause I did okay, many, many, Q-tips and eye makeup remover fluid later.  Nori's super power is liquid eyeliner in one swoop.  I do NOT have this.....I'm going to see her in June and man I'm pumped I miss being a normal human again.   I miss being around someone who gets me so when I say weird things they know where they came from.  Barbie, Nori, I'd give you the moon if you needed it. I love you a lot.....getting to know the inner workings of my brain is near impossible and you two achieved this.... I need to make you a medal on etsy or something. You are my family.

     Nori has accompanied me to these conventions in the past but she has two kids now and was pregnant at the 2016 one, and completely miserable. She's not a person who can hide her emotions well but she was miserable and all she wanted to do was sleep. You can't sleep when the Supernatural hotties are around it's just wrong......

If you look in the top left corner the one who has the reddish hair that's Nor.....I try not to hate her for her other superpower......looking good in every single picture!  I hope she had fun cause I doubt we will ever get to go again. I will but not with her.  She's too busy.

Now that both my "persons" have kids and longer roots it's up to me to drive myself to Atlanta or Birmingham and see them.

In college, where Nori went I went, We were thing 1 and thing 2 attached at the hip. There was one thing she never did to me and it is something I still struggle with......Nori no matter what, she never left me out.  She always included me and wanted me there. I'd give her her space when needed but I never had the feeling she didn't want me. I'm decent at keeping my friends and me out of trouble so that was an added spidey sense....I call it kept me from having to make the scariest phone call to my dad ever.  I do not want to make that phone call.......therefore I developed an uncanny ability to stay out of trouble. 

I am socially awkward you only have to possess a brain to figure that out, but I have a heart of gold.

When you "adult," you can be the nicest person on earth but have one habit they don't like and all the sudden you're just plain rude and no matter how nice and kind and compassionate you are, they don't see it and don't want to.
I'd give anyone anything (well within reason) this is something that until very recently everyone has recognized and that golden light shines and blinds them from the annoying stuff you do.

College degrees don't mean much anymore cause a lot of people have them and you spend years paying off loans that cost more than you even make to work at a job that you can get with just a high school diploma. Thanks college you are basically useless but man I had fun.

That's what an "adult" job is.

I'm pretty sure it's in the dictionary. Look it up or google it.

Become famous or something and money just falling magically into my bank accounts. Like some Kardashian but I might abhor myself so much I don't know.

Win the Powerball lottery, or even just the scratch off......

      Those were the days. Somewhere in my brain Hanging Tough by the New Kids On The Block is playing on a loop. Scary!!!!! I thought I was the bees knees and I had a bit of self worth, which has basically been stomped out of me and lost. I'm not sure if I can find it again. I grew up in the 90s do not judge!!!!


Cause I was a cool 90s kid and Loved the New Kids and was so a Jonathan girl and he turns out gay? Life is NOT RIGHT!  Don't judge me! I remember practicing my autograph, and like most stars it was horrible. What I was going to be famous damn clue. Had no extraordinary talents to speak of so I guess I was going to pull a Kim Kardashian and be famous despite having absolutely zero singing or acting talent. Many have done it and many will for years to come. 

          That's why they are dreams you have as a kid before reality hits you in the face like a ton of insanely hard bricks and it hurts just as badly.

    It's called being a grown up and as a child it's so glamorous, but then you get there and you see the glamour was only a figment of your imagination. Much like an imaginary friend.

It's when the petty queens and kings start nit picking when I want to just throw in the proverbial towel. I don't want to be an adult sometimes.......but that's the thing...there is no going are one.....accept it.

So far in the past few months it's all about getting through one day and eventually one week at a time. Not a day goes by that I don't want to cuss someone out and take off running while giving them the finger as I run away. It's a nice fun dream I have. And sad because the running away makes me look like a coward and ultimately I am.

Adulting is worry......about EVERYTHING.........anyone who says they never worry is lying.

Problem is I like to buy stuff and I like having a roof over my head, electricity and my shows. I also love food. So doing this not in my dreams means finding another job that scarily enough would probably suck worse. Also giving up all purchasing of said aforementioned items and you know, doctors visits.....

I miss the days when I was little and dreamed big that anything was possible

When I was around 5,  I had an imaginary twin sister named Jenny and since I had to I play by myself and my identical imaginary twin. Again! Don't judge me!
Can you imagine 2 of me? Good god the world would explode! Jenny and I were awesome.....shut up whatever you are thinking!!!!

Now, everyday I have to get up and "adult" put on work clothes and drive downtown in a city where there are more cars than people and no where to put them, 82 people a day move here and take up precious room and I can't find a darn parking space. Then simultaneously,  get all my stuff make sure I keep what few friendships I have do a good job and then repeat.....I'm going to the Grand Canyon in September unless they make me get off the plane cause of too fat or something.   That would be my luck.  If we do happen to make it.  I hope it's all it's cracked up to be. I hope for a few minutes it fills me with wonder and awe.....cause not much has lately and Nashville traffic kills your soul......that's a whole other blog.

JP Rambling Queen

1 comment:

  1. I love you to the moon my precious friend. I'm so thankful for you and your heart, and I'm so honored to be your "person".