Friday, August 28, 2009

Somewhere in the World Paparazzi are Crying and Fangirls are getting the Shakes

In case you haven't noticed, it's been a little slow on the news this past couple weeks.

Well, the last of the Kennedy men died, and went to join his brothers wherever they might be. I dunno, I don't judge!

Okay, on that note, I have a question?

Dear Kennedy Clan (that sorta doesn't exist anymore): Enough with the nicknames already,'s confusin

for instance:

John F. Kennedy was called Jack

umm...okay my theory dies here cause Robert was called Robert....hum?

Okay anyhoo, Edward Kennedy was called Teddy and then later someone shortened it to Ted...and then when Edward Kennedy died I was like who?

This just in...beeep beep beep beeep...
DJAM was found dead today in his home...damn another one bites the dust!

Okay I don't really know why this DJAM person was famous but here's a pic and I know that he dated Nicole Richie pre-baby-factoryness and Mandy Moore, but other than maybe being a DJ I have no idea why he was famous
here's a pic:
He was one of those he "just is" famous peeps...sorta like Paris Hilton but not as skeezy!

RIP dude no one deserves to die and it seems like Hollywood is a dangerous place to be famous these days...dude srsly

Okay, so RPattz and KStew have been enjoying some time out of the limelight...hence the title of this blog:
For a couple of weeks, we have heard rumors and tweets from peterfacinelli and gilbirmingham but other than that you wouldn't even know Eclipse was filiming...
Fangirls all around the world were holding their breathe and papparazzi had nothing better to do than talk about
one of the random Kardashian sisters that is not Kim being preggers...

so what, who isn't preggers in hollywood these days?

and some playboy bunny chick named Kendra is preggers are we surprised? It was a slow news week in Hollywierd!
the Kendra preggers chick/playboy bunny girl

Then, yesterday, Robward peeked out of his cocoon for a minute and Fangirls finally let out a sigh of relief...Rob was alive and well and being Edward again!!!! We likey!
Rob finally steps out of his trailer in his Edward Cullen makeup! FINALLY
Then he picks up his little itty bitty coat and his entourage!
and of course Robward with his Soda can...creature of habit that one!

K you know who I DON'T think is all that?
Renee frickin Zellweger! All of a sudden it's like Jen Aniston vs. Renee for the affections of hot hollywood hunk? WTF?
Umm...hi..Bradley Cooper, you are hotness, but what is with your taste in women?
oh she of the squinty eyes!!! How do you score Bradley Cooper...over Jen?


seems the hotter he is the more confusing he's the hotness factor, the more hotness, the more craziness! I swear!
Those eyes are super they work? Just sayin....I mean the woman married Kenny Chesney *blech*

Dear Heather Locklear: You bes look good for ur age but going back onto Melrose Place at ur should have moved on by now Don't ya think?

Woman, I have to say you have the worst taste in men...geez..

Dear Billy Ray Cyrus: Are you freaking kidding me? You have no problem with your daughter dancing on a pole? You calling making her art? What the effspice is wrong with you? I would have grabbed that little girl by the ear and yanked till she got some lessons put in that air-filled head

Chris Rock said it best, you have one job as a Father to a little girl...keep her off the pole!

They say he doesn't want to tell her NO! NEED to or you are gonna have another Lindsay Lohan disaster on your hands...Billy Ray...the only decision you made worse than that mullet...dude!

OMG! Celine Dion is pregnant again! My heart will go on! NOT! Girl what you smokin? Another baby at your age...srsly!

you wanna know who I hate?
This skank and her ugly arrogant ass husband need to get on my ROCKET! God, I hate her!

Dear Robsten: come out come out wherever you are! Give us some news and pictures....the fangirls are gonna die from withdrawal stress...give the papparazzi some money...everyone gotta make a living, right?

Okay, I'm out for now...oh btw...
these people need to fall off the Earth (not really) just the TV earth
Dear Kate Gosselin: Jon is groddy, he's fat, let him see his kids every once in a while and let him go...he's a throw away, you can do better!

Dear Press: Stop talking about them...I'm so OVER it!

I would put Jon on my rocket but he needs to be a Father to those thousands of kids

Sunday, August 23, 2009

70th Post Damn I talk A LOT!

Is it just me or was True Blood only like 43 minutes long..umm..wth?

Isn't it supposed to be an hour long?

Dude, put Eric Northman in the eps more...

If you film him, they will watch!

This ladies is yummy...duh!
It's also on the newest celebmanmeat post go see...

So, in case you haven't been on Twitter in like...I don't know a haven't heard that me, @kellebelle1981, @ecnurse87 and my friend Nori are having a campout at my house so that I can get a picture with PFach and most importantly, this man below:

Hello, Kellan did I mention I love you? Well if not I do!

Dear Kellebelle: Don't kill me! Vamp Bill looked sorta hot in his leather to see the queen.

If they hadn't admitted they were in love and gotten engaged...there would have been Robsten like proportions of stories for mags, such as Us Weekly speculating I mean look at the chemistry just from this picture!
geez could they want each other more?


Okay so @kellebelle1981 being the coolest made me this to remind me of the bliss I will feel in January when I "really" stand next to Kellan, but doesn't my face fit well. I think it was meant to be...yup it's kismet!
This may just be the best pic of Rose and Emmett ever! Ha!
hence, my twitter background..go see @julieperk

Then there is this picture...not so fact down right scary as hell!

This is scary! Me and Johnny were not meant to be apparently! Damn!

It also shows me that I would NOT look good with brown hair.

Lil E: Bella why did you stop kissing me? What's wrong?
Lil B: nothing, humans need water to not get chapped lips...but I do have my burt's bees wax lipstick
Lil E: *sings* I kissed a girl and I liked it she tasted like cherry chapstick
Lil B: Hey, wait, my chapstick doesn't taste like cherry! Who have you been kissing?
Lil E: they are just song lyrics I thought it would be funny
Lil B: *cries and runs off* It's not!
Lil E: *facepalm* YOUR mood swings are giving ME whiplash now!

Lil E cannot seem to do anything right these days. Good thing B loves him irrevocably!

Kstew and RPattz at Kings of Leon...did they didn't they..don't care...

I was just noticing...does it look like Kstew has been eating too many french fries or is it her HAIR or her OUTFIT? She just looks chubby in this pic..just sayin kthanxbye!


These two...their kids are adorable, but they just get on my nerves! I'm so sick of hearing about them in all the tabloids.

Here's the story in a nutshell that should be dropped after I explain
Jon=loser manwhore who doesn't take responsibility for his kids
Kate= bitchy control freak, but good mom who has every right to get to say who gets to be around their kids and be able to hire a babysitter that her soon to be ex-husband won't sleep with

Kate did his body good...
He is fat and sloppy and obviously an idiot! geez! He has lots of baggage...eight kids worth!

Dear Girls who Date him: get a clue he's lame and he is fat and sloppy and sleeps with everything on two female legs...gross!

Dear Gossip Mags: quit beating a dead horse stop printing stuff about them please!

Oh to be the thumb on that exquisite hand..oh to touch your lips...yummmmy! I will see you in January, you can count on that!

some things I'm looking forward to:

1.) Vampire Diaries on the CW, can anyone say Ian Somerhalder?

Hotness times 2, and oh yeah there is some girl in it too!

True Blood Season 3...why does it have to be so long between season?

Burn Notice Season 3-jeffrey Donavan=hotspice
New Moon (November)
get here already! Dude! Hurry the hell up!

So, my car rose from the Dead like Lazarus in the Bible
I still say the key sticks but according to people who didn't crush their right hand in a door they don't see it that way! Well I have to drive it so to all you guys ....shut up!

I've been hangin with some 9 year olds lately couple 10 year olds...i haven't died yet so I'm essentially happy...I guess...not getting paid...maybe some day...

I am now in love with a new show that I can't miss...
so good...dude!
This is Nurse Jackie and her cutie pie hubby whom she is cheating on with no less than at least one man sometimes two and one of these days the fit is gonna sit the fan...she better APPRECIATE her husband is SO in love with her, and so incredibly cute...hello...duhspice!

If the pocket edward pic above looks familiar I copied it from Lil E's blog..just set up my PE and PB just like it...I thought it needed more commentary!

I was asking peeps on Twitter what to blog about..still have nothing so umm..this is me saying bye for now until I have something interesting to talk about..
one quick thing
The Ginger Swan asked for some blondie bear aka Spikeypoo aka Spike from Buffy!

so here's some Spike
Hello there sir..hotness

So many names...blondie bear, spikey, billy idol's idol, james marsters, william the bloody, Mr. Billowy coat of Pain...still no matter what they call u HOTSPICE!

Duster of Hotness..."it was my everything" heheehehehehe Spikey loves his coat..yessirree
and last but extreme certainly not...least...
This bes funny as hell:

Hey Angel is that Mountain Dew in that cup? hehehehehe
and he has his own calendar FOR A REASON!!!
there you go girls hope you like it...mmmm..Spike...why didn't he have an affair with the Furies???? Stupid Furies...
before I'm outie

Dear Lauren from Lauren's Bite: why is your blog set to invite only...wt effspice? is it me? what did I do? I confused
out for now..
that's my opinion..oughta be yours if it's not don't care
Queen of Randomness

Friday, August 21, 2009

A Blog on Why I don't Blog Anymore! LOL

K, so hi! Long time no blog right? Right? I said RIGHT!

Okay then, now that that's settled...let's address the issues...sometimes the gossip mags make me laugh here is an example:

Us Weekly did a:
This is Your Future?:

Kim changed your hair after breaking up with your original...NOT!
Is Kim Kardashian destined to become J-Lo...let's see

1.) J-Lo can sing, Kim can't
2.) J-Lo can act, Kim can't
3.)J-Lo is a good business woman, Kim isn't....

Do we see a pattern or not a pattern here or what? Apart from the use of bleach on their heads I see NO similarities! Maybe it's just me...

Somewhere in the world Adrien Grenier is crossing his fingers and begging that he will turn out as good as this man belowAdrien ain't got nothin' on you babe! You Got It Dude!

Will Jessica Simpson undergo way too much plastic surgery and turn into this woman?:

Loni Anderson...just say no to Botox! and Just say no to plastic surgery...although

It's a little TOO LATE!


Will obscurity and old age be his future like this man ACCORDING TO US WEEKLY
Will RPattz disappear into the shadows of used to be?

Luke Perry was kinda the "Rpattz" of his day...before New Moon was even a gleam in Stephenie Meyer's which is it...whatever you get the picture!


Rebecca Romijn's managed to neuter this one into Mr. Mom

sorry Jerry you didn't have a chance you ain't got nothin on John Stamos!

Poor dude has to stay home with the twin girls while their Mom is bringing home the bacon.

I hope that his baby girls don't turn into girl versions of this:

OH god! Let's pray they got some of Rebecca's genes...If I were Jerry I would be afraid!

Dear Miley Cyrus: Please examine your birth certificate! You are 16 start acting like it instead of like a ho...that's way older...
and why in the hell did you pick the TEEN Choice Awards to do this?

As Chris Rock says, your one duty as a Father is to keep your daughter OFF THE POLE!

Dear Billy Ray Cyrus: HELLO!!! See Above, she needs grounding!!! Stop this girl's allowance or something! I mean DAMN man! She's 16! Right now as it stands you are and EPIC FAIL of a Dad!

Once Upon a Time when Angelina Jolie was still doing coke and carrying Billy Bob's blood around her neck in a vial, Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt decided to start a movie company together and bought the rights to The Time Traveler's Wife.

Then, came the future and can you imagine if they had starred in it like they planned



Instead, Eric Bana and Rachel McAdams starred in the Time Traveler's Wife (Jennifer Aniston) became no one's wife!

And the Time Traveler (Brad Pitt) became one half of Brangelina with like 100 kids....

So it's prolly good that these two starred instead:

Phew! We avoided the ultimate AWKWARD moment! That coulda been wierd. It's why I'm so scared that if these couples break up what is going to happen to their show?

Stephen Moyer and Anna Paquin got all engaged and stuff, if they break-up it might ruin their chemistry on screen

or kill the chances for Team Eric! NO!

Don't you two dare ruin TRUE BLOOD
I will cut a bitch and by bitch I mean Vampire Bill!

You two can date. You can hook up. You can do whatever you want I'm not your Momma, but please for the sake of the millions of Twilight fans out there DON'T SCREW UP EDWARD AND BELLA.

If your dating will mess with Edward and Bella's onscreen chemistry and you two are not good enough actors to pretend to be in Edward and Bella's clandestined romance, then please for the love of God! Don't screw it all up.

Please don't break up before you finish shooting BREAKING DAWN!

in other news this is some smokin hot jail-bait!

Hello hotness! Damn, even in the book you are jail-bait until Breaking Dawn or wait even when...I need to read it again!

Dear Nikki Reed: Never, never, never...did I mention never, date a guy that either:
1.) Has the name Paris
2.) Has ever dated Paris Hilton
Your current boyfriend fits both these descriptions....good picking! NOT!

Dear Alyssa Milano: congrats on your marriage to whoever you married! Hope you are happy! That's all!

K, now in both Us Weekly and OK! mags they talk about this steamy smooch between Rob and Kstew...why if there was a kiss didn't anyone get a PICTURE OF IT!

They got a picture of the "lean-in," but not the actual Did the Papparazzi all sneeze when this mysterious kiss happened?
I don't really care, like I said just shoot the movies and don't let this "maybe" relationship mess up the movie chemistry...kthanxbye

Dear Kstew: I understand why you did it. I think it's good that you are devoted to your art, but shooting is over! GO SEE A HAIR STYLIST STAT!

Dear RPattz: I am starting a collection to buy you some new t-shirts. That one needs to go to the landfill and you and Kristen need showers...Just sayin' you coulda tried a little harder when going out on the town and on a "date" or whatever!
Please? For me? Kthanxbye!

get rid of this....NOW!!! It's time to retire the ole jersey Rob...srsly! Buy some new shirts you have money now there is this verb called shopping...start doing it! ASAP!

Okay, that's all for today

Oh yeah about me,
1.) Finger not completely healed unfortunately
2.) Friday seemed like it took months to get here
3.) I have no time to blog or tweet
4.) I have to get up at the butt-crack of dawn
5.) I am TIRED and my car still has some "trick" to it, that I haven't learned yet...

That's all!

Dear Nori: You will never read my blog prolly, but I love you and I'm glad that you came to see me come up more often...

and to end this with a bang!

Twi-tour in January and New Moon in November...let's hope the days start ticking faster than they seem...right now time is doing the complete opposite of flying, it's landing...err...standing still


That's all, that's my opinion 'oughta be yours!

The Queen of Randomness